Hospitality is a huge part of my legacy. Many times it begins around the table, like at a birthday or Thanksgiving or other celebration... I have added a few stories of hospitality from my past, and they are not your typical family dinner. Enjoy!
Lisa: (00:01)
Welcome to the Building a Life Legacy podcast. My name is Lisa Gregoria and I am so glad you're here
Lisa: (00:14)
For 30 years. I was a elementary school PE teacher and yes, we had a blast. I had a great time with all my kids and it was super fun to see those kids grow up and then become the parents of my next generation kids before I retired. It was awesome, but I had a class size of ranging from about 60 to about 110 and when we'd be all spread out in the gym, we were in rows and columns with about six feet apart, which was great for doing activities jump and rob exercising and all that, the regular PE classes. But when I had to really have them listen and I would explain something, I would bring them up close to me and I'd usually sit down on a bucket or a chair in front of them and the kids loved it. They called it story time.
Lisa: (01:07)
And so that was our special time. And sometimes I just told stories about something silly that happened the week over the weekend or the night before. Or I would tell something about health. I would teach a lesson or I would let allow them to share or I would explain what was coming up next in our PE class. So if I said, Okay, come on up for story time, the kids would scoot in and they'd sit on their seats and they'd look at me and kind of quiet down and be ready to listen. So friends, it's story time. Come on up.
Lisa: (01:52)
Welcome back everybody. It's our second one. I'm super glad that you guys chose to listen to me and I hope that my stories today and in the future continue to bring you back for more. If you guys are just here for the first time, yay us. I'm very excited. So today we're talking about hospitality and hospitality starts at the table. So I want you to think back to any times that you are at the table and you felt really welcome. Was that at a restaurant? Was it at a favorite auntie's house? Was it at a best friend's house for a sleepover? Think back to that and how that made you feel. And I know it makes me feel super warm and I want to be able to share that with others. So as I think back in my memories, where does the hospitality trait and where does that legacy come from?
Lisa: (02:50)
It comes from my parents for sure. I'll get to that in a minute, but it also comes further back. And the further back that I know is my grandparents. So I'm gonna tell you a couple stories about grandparents on both sides. I'm one of the lucky ones. My brother and I are lucky that we grew up with both sets of grandparents. Um, one of them lived in New York, upstate New York, and one set lived in the Florida, in Florida on the coast. And growing up we lived in Kansas, Oklahoma for a little bit and then Kansas. So um, it was a fun trip each summer to go and see the grandparents and usually we would start going to Florida and they were, they lived on the beach. So hospitality was pretty easy, especially when you were a kid. You just needed to go to the beach. So I remember many sand filled sunburn vacations in the summer at the beaches in Florida and it was amazing.
Lisa: (03:56)
But it wasn't the beach that made the impact on our trips to Florida as a family. It was the hospitality that my grandmother and my grandfather who that was Nana and Gia and they were amazing. And you can ask anybody in the family and everyone will tell you the same thing, that sitting at Nas dinner table, you felt like you were the most important person in the world. For sure. She was the queen of hospitality. So, but as a kid, you don't really know that until later because as a kid you think about, Oh, we're going to the beach, We're going doing this fun thing, we're doing this fun thing and, and what's next? What are we doing tomorrow? And all that stuff. And trips to Disney World, and this was when I was a kid, so this was before Epcot Center, this was before Disney World was crazy.
Lisa: (04:54)
It was just magic kingdom. But it was amazing. But my magana, she somehow knew and it was some sort of magic secret, exactly what our favorite thing was at that time, that summer, those few weeks in our life and we would get to her house and in the refrigerator was our very favorite snack. Maybe it was a new snack, maybe it was a new candy bar or maybe it was the kind of Shasta Yes, Shasta soda that we had. A new flavor, exactly the right kind of peanut butter. Mine was always crunchy. Deep south was the one she got and I loved it. But, and my brother would have something, his favorite thing. And then my cousins were there and their favorite things were there. And this was way before internet, way before texting, way before it was super easy to just text our mom and say, Hey, what are the kids like?
Lisa: (05:59)
She had to do a little bit of research and be prepared because it was the moment we showed up and we felt like we were the most special. And it was like not a thing for her. She didn't make a big deal out of it. It was just there like it's supposed to be there. Like it's always there. Oh, well of course I have your favorite thing. And Nana was amazing at that. And Gia, he was the king of the toys and he was a big kid himself, even as a grandfather, if there was a toy, he would recreate it and he would make it better, bigger, faster, cooler, whatever. And he would try it. Those bongo boards that you would go back and forth, like clowns did. Oh yeah, he had those in at 60 some years old. He could do it. He would take us to the beach and we, he would go out there with us and get the little shaker thingy that strained the sand and he would be out there.
Lisa: (07:01)
So we would get exactly the perfect sand dollars or back then we searched for uh, shark's teeth on those beaches. So it hundreds of sharks teeth we would have. And but they were the best ones when Gia would go. And we just felt like the most special people. He had a boat for a while, like a big house boat and we would drive it. And I remember being in the inner coastals, inner coastal waterways of Florida and we would go up on the top on the, I guess the captain's deck or whatever, 11 years old. We would, he would say, Okay, you take the wheel. And we're like, What? Oh my gosh. But he would let us drive and this boat through these intercostals standing right there, just making us feel like we were the king of the world. And it was amazing. And as I look back, those are some of the coolest memories.
Lisa: (07:57)
It wasn't what we did and our trips to Disney, it was the way that they made us feel and that they made us feel welcome. And it was all about hospitality. The cousins would joke and we'd be out as we got a little bit older, we kind of understood what was going on. And as we were out playing or doing our activity for the day, you know, we'd look at our watches because we knew we had better be home to get cleaned up because dinner was at six o'clock sharp period every night, no matter what around the table. And it was dinner with dishes, not paper plates unless we were having a picnic on the beach. And it was one of our favorite things. And even at the meal with all of us around. And usually there was extra cousins or aunts or uncles or whatever, it wasn't, okay, this is Lisa's favorite thing and this is J's favorite thing.
Lisa: (08:51)
And this was Brooke's favorite thing or Lori's favorite thing. It was somebody had their favorite thing at the meal. And I know that Nana spent hours in the kitchen making this, but we wouldn't know it because we thought she was right there with us. And now I know the plan. Gia took care of us during the day and took us all, all these errands while Nana was working her butt off in the kitchen. I, I get it now and I appreciate it even more, but it was amazing. So we'd finish up our vacation time in Florida with Nilla and usually extra family members and we'd load into the station wagon and drive up the coastline to upstate New York where my other grandparents lived. My dad's mom and dad, that's grandma and pop. And they lived in Corning, New York, which is the epitome of blue collar.
Lisa: (09:46)
My grandfather was a truck driver for Corning Glass, I mean straight blue collar, hard working, you couldn't find another harder worker. And my grandma was a, she was a seamstress out of the house and she was a lunch lady, the kitchen lady that opened the drinks, the milks and everything at the elementary school that was across the street. So literally blue collar, hard working. When we visited grandma pop up in the summers, we always had something fun to do. They would come up with something cool, maybe it was a festival nearby or um, fun meal at the firehouse. That was a big deal back then. And there was always crafts and stuff to do. My grandfather would make a tire swing or whatever, all kinds of cool things that they would create for us to do. And then we loved trips to the Glass factory and they had this cool where you could watch the glassblowers and I just remember that.
Lisa: (10:53)
And every evening we sat at the table for dinner and then we would play cards and laugh and tell stories and sometimes other cousins that I rarely got to see, aunts and uncles that I never really knew would come over and tell stories and laugh. But it was around that table where we felt warmth and family and togetherness. I can't remember a year that we didn't go visit NAIA in Florida and grandma and popup in New York. And those memories just made the lasting impression and it wasn't anything fancy, it wasn't anything that they bought us, it was just that time together around the table and laughing and telling stories. Our favorite snack, I remember in New York we would always have Shasta and that was our Shasta Cola and it would just come out of the woodwork somewhere and it end up on the table. That was super fun.
Lisa: (11:57)
Back, back in the day. We didn't, they didn't spend money on Coke. It was Shasta. After high school, after graduating from high school, I went to K State, go wild cats, Ema w Purple Pride forever. Yes. And I, my, after my freshman year, I was recruited in the line to be on the rowing team to try out for the rowing team. So I did that and quickly fell in love with that sport. Not just because of the sport and uh, the opportunity to learn something new but because of the people and talk about a family that we were together at that time working super hard, not getting paid. So let me paint the picture a little bit Back then, rowing was not a funded sport for at the collegiate level, but it was a varsity sport that was non-funded, which means we worked really, really hard and we competed for K State, but we didn't get any kind of funds from the athletic department or the school.
Lisa: (13:08)
So we had to pay our way. But if we did really well and competed at the varsity level, we could earn a varsity letter. Let me tell you what, I still wear that jacket when it's cold because that's a prize possession. So, but, and we had to raise money, fundraise, all that stuff. And then when we traveled to go to competitions, because yes, we were in the middle of Kansas, not a lot of other rowing teams there. So we would have to travel to go to events, go to regattas, we would go to Iowa, Texas was our um, spring break. That's how we did our spring training. So every spring we came down to Texas for a week in Campton tents. And I promise I will talk about those experiences at another podcast. But let's back up a little bit. So about 45 miles away was Topeka and that's actually where I grew up, my hometown.
Lisa: (14:14)
And there was a great big regatta there every spring. And it usually landed sometime around Easter. There was teams from all over Notre Dame, like all kinds of Texas, Oklahoma, Nebraska, all fielded teams. Plus there was a lot of club teams that competed in this race. So it was a two day event. So the first time we're sophomores, were competing as novice. And I called my parents like, uh, probably like three days before. I'm sure I did not give them a whole lot of time. And I said, Hey mom and dad, some of my teammates want to come on Friday night and spend the night at the house, um, before we go to the race early in the morning. Cause we didn't have buses, there was not, you know, we couldn't stay in hotels or anything since we were paying our way. So of course my parents said, Well yeah, of course that's awesome.
Lisa: (15:11)
How many people? And I said, Well, there's nine on my boat and there might be a few more. Okay, no problem. We'll set out, you know, blankets and stuff. They'll sleep on the floor in the basement or whatever. Okay, great, that's awesome. So we show up that first night and I know it was my team, which was nine of us cuz there's eight at row plus our coxswain and I'm pretty certain there was another four. So there was probably five more people plus our coach. So I show up that first day, 20 people, easy mom had the spread, she was prepared then, I mean there was food coming out of the woodworks. They were stepping over us, you know, trying to figure out blankets, came outta who knows where. And we all just kind of plopped down Friday evening, late on the floor wherever and snuggled in for the night and then woke up to my dad fixing pancakes and to go stuff.
Lisa: (16:19)
I don't even know what, what it was, I'm sure there was fruit and snacks that he had made for us to go with a tent so we could pitch the tent out by the lake. So we would have some shade for the day, ready to go at six o'clock in the morning. I mean pancakes for days. And that's the way it was. So later that evening, as the race day went on, we realized several of us were gonna be in the finals, which would be the next day. I said, Mom, can more people come over tonight to spend the night to crash because we don't wanna drive the hour back home and then come back early in the morning. Oh yeah, I am fairly certain by that second night we had 50 people spending the night college kids spread out all over the house upstairs, downstairs, the basement, wherever, couches, floors, beds, everybody packed in, people tiptoeing over each other to get to the bathroom.
Lisa: (17:26)
Luckily I think we had like three extra bathrooms so we could take turns and so forth. And more food came out of the woodworks. It, it was crazy and it, it was awesome. Mom and dad made lasagna for that second night and I don't know how many lasagnas they must found because the food kept showing up. And then she went and did her recipes and made this buster bar dessert with ice cream and chocolate and all this deliciousness and salads, everything. And we just all sat around outside, inside when people just kept coming in. Cuz as they finished in the day, they kept showing up and more kids would show up and my dad would get out another panel, lasagna and feed more people and then we'd scoot off the table and then more would show up and scoot off the table. And they had found some more neighbors that were willing to farm out uh, their showers so we could rinse off and take a quick shower as the evening came on.
Lisa: (18:35)
And then we all went to sleep. And then the next morning, sure enough, if there wasn't bowls of oatmeal and stuffed to go so we could head to the lake again, this became an annual tradition every year for the four years that I rode. The entire team would come in and know that they were gonna get fed. We were gonna sit around the table and laugh and laugh some more and tell stories about the day, about the last year, about what was happening at school. And my parents just sat there in the middle of it and wanted to hear all the stories mom and dad wanted to. So last week I texted my three of my teammates, actually four of my teammates and I messaged them saying that I was gonna talk about this on the podcast. I said, What was your memories? And all three of them within minutes said it was the feeling of welcome to the family and you are part of this family.
Lisa: (19:43)
And it was, it didn't matter how many people, there was so much food and each of 'em said that the food just kept coming, but it wasn't just about the food, it was about we were welcome and we were part of that family and mom and dad made us feel a part of that family. And one of the, one of my girlfriends said she was supposed to go to some fraternity party, but she said, no way. I'm not even missing it because I'm not gonna miss Mr. Or Mrs. G's food, dinner and time at their house. So that became such a powerful, impactful time around the table in my college years that I never forgot that we moved to Texas my senior year in college and the rowing team was, I was still on the rowing team and we actually had a competition and it was like early November and it was in Dallas and just so happened that my parents were moving to Allen, Texas that very same weekend.
Lisa: (20:57)
So literally my team, we were, I think we were fancy and had a bus then or something like that, rented a van or something and the team followed my mom who was driving with the household goods, basically the kitchen set up in the pickup truck and we kind of followed her in to the parsonage that they were moving into. Cause my dad's passed her. So they lived in the parsonage for a little while and we literally walked in with 40 people and a team in the middle of the night because I'm sure it was the middle of the night when we arrived and everybody from the team helped my mom carry in the kitchen stuff and some groceries and everything and we all crashed out. Luckily the house was empty so there was plenty of room for everybody to just find a pallet on the floor and sleep.
Lisa: (21:58)
And there was three bathrooms and so we just kind of traded off 40 people, college kids, sleeping on floors. So then that next morning my mom got up cuz we were supposed to get up and be out of there by 7:00 AM. So my mom got up super early after driving to this brand new town all evening and tiptoed around with the light of the pantry light in the kitchen. And she tiptoed around stepping over sleeping college kids to make breakfast for us before we had to leave for the day in which she was gonna later bring a picnic lunch and stop and get again in this brand new town and stop and get everything for us to make sure that we were good, had were fed and ready to go for our races on race day. So literally my team ushered my parents to across state borders and welcomed them to another state.
Lisa: (23:04)
So that team was definitely a family and once again around that table made those memories. So fast forward about, I don't know, 15 years later after the college years, my brother and I started working together in our production company. We started as just DJs, like doing weddings and school parties and so forth. And then he started working for the city of uh, Alan and would do their 4th of July. Then it became a big production to do this, uh, 4th of July celebration thing and we would have 15, 20 people on our crew for the day because we did video production, staging, lighting, sound, all of it. And so I was in charge of feeding all of this crew for three days. So enter the old crew dinners that my mom and dad did and that entered in the back of my mind, enter in the way we sat around the table at Grandma and Papa's house and laughed and even with people we didn't even know, enter nana and her amazing hospitality and making sure that we had exactly our favorite and inter Gia where there was always something fun and new and bigger and better.
Lisa: (24:31)
Putting those legacies and those memories to work. I started feeding the crew. So I would always make sure that I would try to find out, cuz most of our crew came from different shows that we had done in the previous months or whatever. And I would make sure I found out, what is your favorite soft drink? What's your favorite snack? Are you allergic to anything? Who's vegetarian? Who's vegan? Who likes this? Who's, you know, I had one kid that couldn't have any protein. I mean I had to figure it all out. So I would provide food for them for three days and our table was this canopy tent and we'd have a table and I'd have a bunch of mismatch lawn chairs and when they were done with whatever and they could take a break with the setting up and it was hot, so hot, they would come over under the shade with fans on and I would have their snacks ready.
Lisa: (25:36)
Usually that meant I spent the morning putting together peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, different kinds of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, different, different kinds of jelly, different kinds of peanut butter, Turkey, all the different things. So they would have something to eat and then be able to continue. Then there was the snacks. So they would look at the table, they're like, walk over. This is my favorite. I love this one. Oh, this one's my favorite. So it was so cool to hear them say that this was their favorite thing. And then they would sit down for a few minutes rest, tell a story from the morning or from the last year, cool off for a second the best we could, and then back to work. And then I had to come up with some more to eat later that day and then the next day and the next morning and the next morning.
Lisa: (26:27)
But one of the things they love besides their favorite drink in the cooler or their favorite snack on the table was Lisa's special cold towels. So I found that after working out in the sun, and a lot of times when you're doing camera ops, you don't get shade because your camera is up there and you're not in the shade and you have to stand there for a long time, straight in the sun, a hundred degree weather. So nothing better than a really cool towel thrown around your neck just when you're about to pass out from the heat. So I discovered a little secret potion of some essential oils and I would put it in the cooler and I'd walk around and just drap that cold towel on their shoulders and they could function for the next hour in the heat. Then it was all about hospitality, taking care of those kids, learning about what their needs were and then meeting their needs.
Lisa: (27:32)
When I get the opportunity to feed a crowd, I always think back to naia and grandma and papa and mom and dad and those crew dinners and all the times I've fed all of the the pees and I try to meet the needs. Think back to your past. If you love it, keep it. Keep those traditions alive. If it's weird, if you don't like it, change it. Build new traditions, build your new legacy. Well, hey, I hope y'